'Lets not expect anything from each other.. lets just be friends who don't expect anything.. so that we will not end up in hard-feelings..", whenever someone says like that, I tend to say, "Bullshit!!"..
Where is relationship without expectation. The level of expectation could be more or less. But it will always be there. Relationships are formed by expectations. An expectation for a smile.. for a happy word.. for courtesy.. for sharing.. for helping.. for consoling.. for being there.. for watching over.. for caring.. for loving.. for friendliness.. and what not.. If someone says that I don't have any expectation, then he/she is back to square one, stranger!!
I think that expectations never hurt.. I tend to say that not having the maturity level to understand the situations or other's mentality hurts. Probably thats the reason why people get hurt. If something what they expect is not fulfilled by the other person, and if they fail to understand why they couldn't do so, is what the cause for hurt. Not the expectation. Or possibly if that is the character of that 'other' person not to fulfill any of the expectations from you, then you are probably in the wrong relationship. It just isn't working out.
Trust me.. You cannot change your expectation, I believe. You can hide it. You can control your disappointment.. You can control not to express the feelings of being hurt.. You can even control the anger.. but the fact is, they will take a different form and eventually come out.. Thats Newton's third law, I guess ;-)
Talking or discussing about things that disappoint you can somehow help in the relationship. If the disappointments are because of situations, you can trust that the situations will change one day or the other. For sure, you can control, wait.. But if you are ending up getting hurt because of the other person's character, well.. that is something to consider.. Because that could mean that you might have to go through it for the rest of your life.. But at the same time, developing the mentality and maturity to see the other person's situations from their own eyes can help yourself not to get hurt too much. That is something very important in life, I believe..